Friday, February 11, 2011

Sad Eyes

Today my hair fell out.

I knew it was coming and I tried my hardest to prepare myself for it. I remember the night Josh's hair fell out. He knocked on my door and woke me up. He was standing there in the hall with such sad eyes and an open palm with a lock of hair in it.

I have to admit, I didn't really understand why he was quite so upset, we knew this was coming. Seemed like out of all the horrible things he had to go through that losing his hair would've been the easiest. But it wasn't.

When I realized my hair was coming out the other day, it was not a great moment, but it wasn't too hard of a one either. But, today, when it all started coming out and I saw myself in the mirror for the first time, I saw my brother's sad eyes in my own reflection. It hit me hard.

Its not just the vanity of it. Yes, I hate losing my hair, I quite liked it. I may have had a bit of a receding hairline but I still had hair. Its the reminder that this is not just a dream, its a reality. I'm not just changed on the inside, now its out there for everyone to see. Now I'm branded: CANCER PATIENT

I'll be alright. I will learn to be proud of it. Not just a brand to show people that I have cancer but a brand to show people that I'm fighting that cancer. And I plan on winning.

5 comments:

Heather said...

Oh Jeremy....

Kim Wheeler said...

Customer: Why is my hairline receding? Barber: It's not. Your scalp is advancing. LOL!!! I think you will look COOL with a bald head. You know there are actually guys out there who shave their heads on purpose. LOL!! Sorry you're loosing your hair. I've always heard it grows back thicker. Hang in there! You're fighting a "Great" fight!

Your Favorite Teacher

Anonymous said...
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♫♪♫ Mardi said...

I'm sorry Jeremy :( but like I said you still look great! I am cheering for you to win! I have no doubt you will! Stay strong! I'm praying for you.

sharon said...

You ARE going to win this battle!!! I am just so sorry you are having this battle...